What Women Want
It’s finally happened. Your girl has shown an interest in golf. She says she wants to go to the driving range with you. Cute right? A nice little date night. But disaster strikes, and by the end of the night you’re not talking to each other and you can’t figure out why.
So I’m about to tell you why.
The most important thing you need to remember is that generally when we go to try something new, it’s for fun. Everyone is different and we all have different motivations in anything we do in life. Going to the driving range is kind of like going 10 pin bowling. There’s a goal and you can record your score if you want to, but really you’re there for the banter and the beers.
So here’s where you went wrong. You went to the driving range and within 5 minutes, you had given her 20 tips on how to hit the ball, hit a draw, and do the perfect golf swing. Within 30, you’re getting frustrated and start telling her that she’s doing it wrong and not listening.
Quote, “Give me the club, I’ll show you how.”
Now she won’t talk to you.
NOT HELPFUL. I know your heart is in the right place, but we need to try a new tact. This story is not anecdotal. Over the past 11 years of coaching, I couldn’t tell you how many times I have heard a story along these lines. And it doesn’t just apply to the driving range, but on the golf course too. Luckily, it’s not too late to salvage the situation…
So how can you introduce your girl to the game, be helpful and supportive, and still be talking at the end of the day? Ok, let’s talk motivations:
Fun
To meet new people
To share your interest
Fitness
Me time
Challenge
To learn something new
Notice that this list doesn’t necessarily involve; a) having a handicap, b) winning competitions, c) dedicating every spare minute to golf or d) only ever playing golf with you. Don’t be offended if this is the case. It just means that golf is going to be more of a social thing for her.
Here are a few ideas to make golf more fun for her:
If you take her to the driving range, let her smash away and IF she asks for advice then drip feed a few tips. Focus on the set up and the idea of how to hit the ball (posture/stability/which part of the club to hit). Pro tip, if it makes the swing look pretty but don’t improve strike, forget about it. Leave the technical stuff to the pros- she might fancy a lesson at some point.
Suggest that she finds a group class. For the past few years, NZ Golf has been running an initiative called She Loves Golf. You can find classes all around NZ focussed on allowing new lady golfers to give it a go in a relaxed and fun environment. I run a number of sessions that includes driving range and practice meet ups, as well as Twilight Golf (6 holes in carts followed by wine and social time). All sessions are female only, all new golfers and you don’t even need any experience. The best thing about these sessions is the awesome girls that come along so it’s a great way to make new friends and build up a golf community!! You can find out more at www.lovegolf.co.nz/she-loves-golf or head to my events page to see what I have coming up!!
Take her on the golf course. Take a cart, a few Long White’s and just do 4-6 holes. For a beginner, regardless of age or gender, this is more than enough. It’s really important to pick a quiet time so that neither of you feel under pressure from other golfers. This can be a stressful situation on the course. If others do catch you up, stand to the side and let them play through. It’s a lot more fun learning on the golf course and learning is accelerated just by being on the course and understanding the end goal. I like to play something like Canadien foursomes (both drive then alternate shots) with new golfers. It takes off the pressure and helps the player get round the course faster. Remember, it’s supposed to be fun!!! NO SCORE, NO RULES, BE PATIENT and ENCOURAGE HER.
Get the right equipment. I know it seems like a ball ache to buy a new set of clubs, but your clubs are too heavy and probably too long for her. Try and get hold of some ladies clubs (unless your girl is really tall)- these are designed to be lighter, shorter and easier to hit. It will make the learning experience way more fun for you both! Oh and if she has long nails, a glove will stop her getting sore hands from nails digging into her hands.
Clothing is a hot topic in golf and can be a really off-putting part of golf for girls. If you’re going to the range, sports gear is perfect. Make sure it’s not too short and not too low cut, but other than that, comfy cloths and trainers will be ideal and will make your girl feel confident. The golf course is a different story. Luckily in NZ we are pretty relaxed and almost anything goes but that can vary from club to club. Sports clothes are usually ok, but if you’re not sure, make sure you take an extra polo shirt and some chino shorts/pants/skort for her to wear if the rules are more stringent. Comfort is key so give her a voucher to buy some nice golf gear- it will make her feel confident and want to wear it on the course (we really are simple creatures, contrary to popular belief).
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Golf is fun and can be a fantastic way to spend time with your significant other. But it’s also a great way to meet new people, exercise and I think we can all agree it’s definitely a challenge. Make sure you nurture the needs of your newly found golf girl and she’ll be hooked for life!!
Love,
Coach Em